Well I am back here after quite a while. Just having a whirlwind of thoughts in my mind at the moment which I feel like sharing, I know I am talking to people who I dont even know and probably don’t care either but this is place is as good as any to key-in m thoughts. Well, I am 25 and spent a Saturday all alone doing nothing. It’s probably not normal for guys of my age. But then I have friends who are either out of town or just too busy with their own lives to have sometime hangout. Now and then I have this feeling where I should probably find better friends or maybe as time passes I’ll get used to this life and make friends with this loneliness.
Sitting alone I either spend time with my computer or just thinking about the gal who bailed out on me almost a year back now. It’s funny how she said,”I love you. Tomorrow i’m going to talk to my parents about us.” The next day she broke up with me over a text saying she was not sure. I still somehow cannot figure out what I did wrong. I have moved to the category of people who are treated to the ‘buddy don’t worry you deserve better’ line ever since. She left a big void, I have problems filling. Her dumping me wasn’t my fault but being stuck over her when she has totally forgotten me is entirely my fault.I’m not dealing with this thing well. I don’t have people who are helping me out and it’s also that I am too scared to talk to people about this. In faking a smile and pretending i’m all ok I am hurting myself within.
I need to stop doing this to myself. Sure the future is scary but just because your afraid of moving on you cannot let yourself be haunted by your past. I don’t live there anymore. It’s simple but only my stupid heart doesn’t understand.
Perfect Life !!! 