Social ?

I am a part of 13 different WhatsApp groups, I have 700 friends on Facebook and numerous phone contacts yet I had to catch a Saturday night movie alone. Well sums it all up, doesn’t it?
We claim to have become more social with all these virtual media intruding our lives but trust me we have become anything but social.
     Another simple example where the other day we were making a one day trip plan in a WhatsApp group. After hours of discussion all we could concur was that everyone was to busy to arrive at a common consensus but had enough time to waste on this stupid app which if it didn’t exist could have led to us all meeting at some place and having this discussion.
     Sadly we’ve moved more apart and close. People have started to like the idea of posting a simple group message rather than actually hanging out with the group. These so called smartphones have done more bad than good. Facebook is a platform which we invented to connect with people but ironically it had a million privacy settings which helps us hide things from everyone. I don’t remember the last time I turned on Facebook chat because the very people I befriended, now I have no interest in talking to.
     I write this small piece because I have started to miss the point of all this social media and people are drifting away from me and probably each other. We need an intervention. We need to get back our lives. Hangout with people rather than being part of an online hangout. Trust me talking to people is much more fun that a group message. Watching your loved ones smile is more precious than a smiley.
     Its time we stop becoming slaves to the the technology we mastered. Its time we start living again, living the right way.

An Honest Confession

It is 5am here in India and I am wide awake. I dreamt of her. I saw her face as vivid as rhe first time we met, heard her voice as clear as it was when we first talked. She was right there but only as a dream, a beautiful nightmare.I have everything in life but peace. It’s the same story as half of you around the world have, we fall in love, spend time with them and then all of a sudden they decide to leave you for some absurd reason.
I was convinced she was the one. 3 years in a relationship and everyday I fell in love with the girl afresh. I fell in love with her smile, her innocence, her simplicity. For me putting a smile on her face was the ultimate goal. Never in my wildest dream had I ever thought the girl would leave but one fine day she did. Out of the blue and I neverI even saw it coming.
Its been a year an her memories still haunt me. Not that haven’t made honest attempts at moving on or getting my life started again, I swear to God I have. I’ve spent time with people, I’ve take breaks, tried going out again finding new love, spent more money than I have on things I don’t even need. I’ve never moved on ant this fear that I never will gives me a chill. This is an honest confession, a year on and many many attempts later I Still Lover Her…..

Random Thoughts

     Well I am back here after quite a while. Just having a whirlwind of thoughts in my mind at the moment which I feel like sharing, I know I am talking to people who I dont even know and probably don’t care either but this is place is as good as any to key-in m thoughts. Well, I am 25 and spent a Saturday all alone doing nothing. It’s probably not normal for guys of my age. But then I have friends who are either out of town or just too busy with their own lives to have sometime hangout. Now and then I have this feeling where I should probably find better friends or maybe as time passes I’ll get used to this life and make friends with this loneliness.

     Sitting alone I either spend time with my computer or just thinking about the gal who bailed out on me almost a  year back now. It’s funny how she said,”I love you. Tomorrow i’m going to talk to my parents about us.” The next day she broke up with me over a text saying she was not sure. I still somehow cannot figure out what I did wrong. I have moved to the category of people who are treated to the ‘buddy don’t worry you deserve better’ line ever since. She left a big void, I have problems filling. Her dumping me wasn’t my fault but being stuck over her when she has totally forgotten me is entirely my fault.I’m not dealing with this thing well. I don’t have people who are helping me out and it’s also that I am too scared to talk to people about this. In faking a smile and pretending i’m all ok I am  hurting myself within.

     I need to stop doing this to myself. Sure the future is scary but just because your afraid of moving on you cannot let yourself be haunted by your past. I don’t live there anymore. It’s simple but only my stupid heart doesn’t understand.

 

Saturday Morning Thoughts

I’ve recently joined a rare species of people who hate weekends. I know it sounds down right stupid, the idea even, but I have my own reasons.
Well considering I am a working professional makes the above lines even more surprising. But let me tell you my reasons for hating weekends comes in a super cute package.
Like most other stories go yes this one also has that pretty element called a girl. Not really the poetic kind who could describe her in perfect words and won’t even try. But she’s pretty , seems down to earth on the first impressions a bit of style freak looking at the outfits. Just the right mix the girl is. For her I am just the onlooker, the guy on the skywalk maybe that it but for me there’s a lot more to the story. Lots of words there to be said…lots of feelings to be expressed…lots of love which stays inside of me…something I need to tell her. Something she needs to know. At the moment I have no idea when or how I am going to do it but I just know I have to do it.

Options and Priorities

I just happen to over think things maybe, dunno but then that’s just me.
Everyone is born with a gift ,mine I believe is just being the goto person for everybody.
Many people I meet love sharing things with me they just come to me when they need a friend or someone to talk to when they are said..had a fight with their boyfriends and stuff like that.
Well its good people trust you so much but then I make these people my priority. I don’t know why but I seem to develop an attachment for these people but when I need someone to talk to..someone to goto in my bad times these same people just treat me as an option. I don’t even matter to them…atleast that’s what I feel..Maybe its wrong but I’m having a hard time dealing with this

17th Jan 2014

I get back to writing when i feel very in low in life. It helps me let go of things instead of holding them back to myself.

I practically dont have someone who I would share this with how i feel right about now, very low, very lonely all alone.

i very often feel there’s nothing to look forward to apart from work. Getting up following the same schedule ..same old work …and end of the day there’s nothing different from yesterday. Was I always like this, well even I don’t know that. But I have become this person who always want’s to be with someone. Its not that I am lonely or do not have people in my life. It’s just that the people I have are too busy in their own world. Their own girlfriends, boyfriends whatever I do not know. Some people are just plain selfish. Probably the worst kind of selfish. All they will remember me is when they need my help. Oh seriously I mean when am I going to stop meeting such people, God knows.

Life Goes on !!!

    Siting in front of my computer screen having nothing to do is the time when a lot of old memories start coming back. People who touched your life, time spent with the loved ones, parents , girlfriends, friends, sibling , cousins. All these people no matter however important, you cannot have all of them with you for the whole of your life. 

   You can think why not but then that is life. People who touched your life and aren’t with you have a sole purpose of inspiring you, making you smile when you are sitting by the window thinking of the past. There are people who leave us, people who leave behind. But there’s a reason theses people in your past din’t make it to your future. 

  Whatever the reason death, moving away, break-ups everything has a right reason and in time you being to see the bigger picture. This is all coming to my mind now because I am too busy thinking of my someone who isn’t with me anymore. But she will always be there, her smile etched into my memory, still feeling the warmth she had to offer, the first kiss still fresh in my memory. Yes it hurts to not have her by my side today, yes i would want to go back and change something and make things right. But that’s not how life works. You can’t have everything in life and you have to live with the fact that you can’t set everything right. Cherish the memories, remember the moments and smile . That’s what is best to do. It’s good to have a past but its bad to live in it. Life is best lived forward. People will come and go but your life goes on …

There way too much time !!!

Well getting dumped by a gal leaves you with too much time I guess. Well after you are past the so called grieving period there like the whole world of time at your mercy. Trust me its actually fun what you might end up and discovering about yourself.

For me the grieving period still continues but I don’t really care much. It was never much of a relationship and hence the attachment levels weren’t great for me to bother me as much. Now after shes gone I get to do the cool stuff like play my PS3 without being disturbed by phone calls and texts. I can roam around the city taking pictures.

Of course I miss her, God knows I do but there’s more to life I believe. It goes on

 

 

You are Unique !!!

If you lose perspective,your life is wasted they say. Doesn’t really take much to understand the deeper meaning the line has. God made millions of different people. He din’t just go copy pasting , he put effort into everyone of us and made us what we …unique in our own way, each one of us.
We weren’t put on the earth to please someone. It’s a competition for sure but I believe it is a competition against ourselves and not our fellow beings. So what you did to impress others doesn’t count but what you did to impress yourself , to be a better person today than you were yesterday does.
If you live to impress others you fail to explore your gifts. Your reason for existence may not be fulfilled by living your life on someone else’s terms. No one can play your role better than yourself. So in this play called life try and
play your part. Discover yourself and try and be a better version of yourself.
Live life on your own terms.The people who you try to impress today may not be there tomorrow. People will come and go. Forget what you are doing to impress others. Try and impress yourself. Wake up everyday to be a better person than you were yesterday. Find what makes you unique and live upto your potential. After all you are answerable to God and for the effort he put into molding you,it’s your duty to discover yourself and be the person he wants you to be.